American Idol Season 7

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Just kidding.

Syesha went home.  That’s today “big” news that really isn’t all that big.  As a matter of fact, we could have predicted this weeks ago.  Last night’s show was even more draggy than the night before.  If you were wondering whether it really takes a full HOUR to eliminate one of three contestants, you got your answer last night.  And that would be that yes, yes it does.

We got to sit through all three contestant’s journey’s back home and oh, what a blast that was.  We got to see Archie cry, say “gosh” 50 million times in all his awkward glory and soak up all the cheers from his adoring teenybopper fans.

Syesha’s visit back home in Florida allowed us to see her high school where she gave all the kids some words of wisdom about how it’s always possible to fulfill your dreams.  Call me a cynic but I think it’s easy to fulfill your dreams when you’re:

1.  Incredibly attractive

2.  Born with talent to sing well

3.  On the most popular tv show in history

This isn’t to say that people can’t live their dreams but let’s get real here, Syesha!  Not everybody is born a star.  The rest of Syesha’s visit home consisted of crazy ladies shoving their babies in her arms and demanding autographs and an emotional limo ride.

David Cook’s brother got called on stage to help give us all the ‘real story’ behind David’s American Idol audition.  Apparently David just went to give his brother moral support and wound up being asked to audition by some big shot producer.  I guess we’ll all just have to buy that story, won’t we?  Either way, David made it and his brother Andrew must be waking up to the sweet smell of failure every morning.  Ouch.

After all the filler, Ryan Seacrest finally got down to business and booted Syesha off the show.  He acted as if it was some big surprise but even Syesha herself knew that her time on Idol was over.

Next week is the FINALE!  The David’s will duke it out.  Who is going to win?  Originally I felt like David Archuleta had this thing in the bag but here lately I’m actually starting to think that David Cook is going straight to the top.  It’s definitely going to be a show worth watching.

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This week’s Idol was a bit of a drag overall, but I guess that’s what this show is all about.  Here’s the thing - we all know that Syesha has no chance whatsoever so I can’t be the only one who felt guilty watching her pour all her energy into 3 performances which still weren’t going to edge her into the finale.  It’s unfortunate that she has to be the third wheel in all this David man-love.

I’m not going to rehash every detail in this post.  Instead, let’s just get to the point.  I’m growing a bit impatient with Idol (as I usually do by the end of the season).  By this point everybody’s got their favorites, they’re all going to get signed and it’s basically just a popularity contest rather than a show about talent.  Like, vote for who you think ought to be this year’s prom King.  Lame.  Anyway.

David Archuleta aka “Archie” had a whole lot of drama this week in the news when his annoying dad got banned from being backstage.  Apparently the guy is an a-hole.  All this buzz about Archie pretty much sealed the deal for him in the finale though.  It didn’t matter if he got up and burped the alphabet, his fans have done enough work to get him through to the end.  The kid wasn’t even good this week.  Paula picked a crappy song with no melody, Archie himself picked Chris Brown’s “With You” which got totally butchered.  As Randy put it, he really looks weird singing about his “boo”.  And the producers picked some other ballad that was slow as molasses and more boring than watching paint dry.

Syesha had to sing an Alecia Keys song given to her by Randy.  She really didn’t do too much to change it up.  A few changes in notes here and there but ultimately, Alicia sings that song so much better.  Then she picked “Fever” which has already been done a million different times by a million other artists.  She looked sexy dancing with a chair, but eh, even sex appeal couldn’t get her in the top 2.  Her last song was picked by the producers… can’t remember the name of it but it was really upbeat and didn’t feel at all like something Syesha could pull off.  She tried.  She really tried.

Finally, David Cook’s performances consisted of a freakin’ Roberta Flack song (picked by Simon - what was he thinking??) that didn’t turn out very well.  David’s own songchoice, Switchfoot’s “Dare You To Move” which could have been good if it weren’t drastically cut down to fit a ridiculously small time slot.  And then Aerosmith’s “I Don’t Want To Miss A Thing” which had an interesting arrangement but seriously?  It wasn’t earth-shattering.

The judges weigh in and let Syesha know that she needs to pack her bags up because all her efforts were in vain.  Nice, huh?  That’s showbusiness for ya!

As for last night’s results?  Join me in the next post to find out all the surprises.  Hint - there are no surprises

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